Monday, March 24, 2008

The Best Little Whore In Maryland


So I'm watching SVU and this girl is a prostitute and this makes me think of the recent on-goings of disgraced former governor Eliot Spitzer and his high dolla ho "Kristen" a.k.a. "Ashley Alexandra Dupré" a.k.a. she's got too many fucking aliases. I got to thinking of how I've always wondered if I could be a prostitute... If i could do it. I'm not quite sure but to tell you the truth, with decent paying jobs scarce, the thought (however jokingly) crossed my mine tonight. Now, I know every ho can't be a high dolla ho like my girl Ashley (as pictured on the right if you were wondering). SVU pointed out to me that prostitutes are often abused, raped, murdered, etc. But I was thinking, maybe those aren't the smart ones. I wouldn't even consider Ms. Dupree one of the smart ones. My guess is the only way to make this business work for you is to not try and make a real career out of it.

Gone are the days of The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas and Pretty Woman. Everyone knows that Richard Gere is not going to marry your slutty ass and Burt Reynolds can't try to save your brothel AND run for office (while singing too). So what I'm proposing for myself is a short-term thing, very discreet and very brief. What if I were to prostitute for my summer job? I've got a monkey on my back in the form of a Macbook Pro and I can't see putting in all this effort for $6.50/hr at some job that is not even cultivating my skills. But what about the risks? Any job that pays well has risk potential of some sort (they say lawyers and doctors have the highest suicide rate). I'm not definitely committing myself to the idea but if nothing comes my way I might just become The Best Little Whore In Maryland this summer. And, hey, if one of my johns gets out of line I'll have Stabler and Benson handle that bitch.

1 comment:

(fŭng'kē) [blak] [chik] said...

I don't think that profession provides health benefits! LOL!